Scott Miller
05-06-2004, 07:57 PM
THE YEAR'S BEST [ACTUAL] HEADLINES OF 2003:
Crack Found on Governor's Daughter
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?
Prostitutes Appeal to Pope
Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
Teacher Strikes Idle Kids
Miners Refuse to Work after Death
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
War Dims Hope for Peace
If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
And the winner is.... Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
They also included some bathroom graffiti:
If life is a waste of time,
and time is a waste of life,
then let's all get wasted together
and have the time of our lives.
Fighting for peace is like
screwing for virginity.
If voting could really change things,
it would be illegal.
If pro is opposite of con,
then what is the opposite of progress?
Congress!
Scott
Crack Found on Governor's Daughter
Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?
Prostitutes Appeal to Pope
Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
Teacher Strikes Idle Kids
Miners Refuse to Work after Death
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
War Dims Hope for Peace
If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge
New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy
Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
And the winner is.... Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
They also included some bathroom graffiti:
If life is a waste of time,
and time is a waste of life,
then let's all get wasted together
and have the time of our lives.
Fighting for peace is like
screwing for virginity.
If voting could really change things,
it would be illegal.
If pro is opposite of con,
then what is the opposite of progress?
Congress!
Scott